Writing funny mysteries (and more!) for you.

Bill Alive
Bill Alive
Writer. Thinker. Goofball.
Feb 26, 2021 3 min read

Free Read Friday! 🎁 πŸ“• πŸŽ‰ More Pretentious Poetry (+ More Photos!)

Did you think that self-help poem a few weeks back was a one-off? Are you kidding? This is a GENRE.

Welcome to your weekly FREE READ!

I'm trying something new in 2021. Every Friday, I'm going to give you a free story of mine or a selection from one of my books, right here on billalive.com.

But, there's a twist. After a week, this read will usually vanish.

(Generally into a book you can go buy for a few bucks. But still.)

So read this now, while you can...

This Week: I Just Really Love These Silly Poems

We've spent the last several weeks featuring my upcoming self-help parody…

And now it's launched! Live on Amazon.

So next week, for our free read, we'll move on to a whole new book. I think you'll enjoy it…

But for now, here's one last zany selection. Once again, our esteemed "photojournalist-poet", Kengsley Beaumarchais, shares his wisdom in a potent mixture of beat poetry and possibly incongruous stock photography.

I'm not sure what you think of this, but I could laugh at this stuff all day. I might wind up doing a whole separate coffee table book just for Kengsley's poetry.

For now, though, we must satisfy ourselves with these brief glimpses of his towering, yet humble, genius…

Note: Kenglsey did not choose the title that accompanies this poem. Alexio, being a marketing guru, often chooses a new title when he publishes his friends' work. Got to get those clicks…

Hour 18! The WISDOM of Grass (A Poem That Has Something To Do With the Law of Attraction, I'm Pretty Sure!)

Guest Photo-Poem by Kengsley Beaumarchais


A woman looks out,

    and she thinks




the world is so





             but I have to mow

    the lawn




  and there are so






maybe the dogs

will do it





        nice work, boys






Kengsley Beaumarchais, photojournalist-poet, presently divides his time between Dubai, Newark, and an insufficiency of cats.

Thank you for enjoying this FREE READ

Thanks for enjoying this free read!

A selection from my new self-help parody:

Rich, Skinny, and Super Spiritual!

Change your ENTIRE LIFE in just 24 HOURS!!
(A parody self-help book.)
Starring an Internet gazillionaire, a lost dolphin, and a desperate crew of oddball bloggers...

Get It Now!

See you next Friday! Happy reading!

[Bill Alive]

Bill Alive

Can't wait until next week? Get my other books here.